Am I Deceived?

How do we know if we are deceived? Well, the problem is, we don’t!

I have been deceived. Rotten fruit was produced in my life and hurting people around me during that time. Now that I am on the other side of it, I have a litmus test. This is a good way of figuring out if we are deceived by what we actually believe.

Here it is. It sounds so simplistic, but it’s pretty deep. Is your love for others close and far growing? Do you care about the lost? Has your patience been increasing at all? Does your Joy overflow because you know the Lord and not because your circumstances are the way you want them? Do you delight yourself in the Lord or does the latter part of that verse (of getting the desires of your heart) count more than the first part of the verse?

I suppose there are many ways that we can be deceived and I have thought of three major ways . The first and biggest way is not scouring our Bibles and washing our minds daily with it. Letting it rip up our deeply rutted selfishness.

The second way to be deceived is by listening to people who use the Word for their selfish gain. Those who tickle the ears. It could be a family member, but it could be somebody on the Internet with a platform. And finally, we are deceived because of our own desires. The Lord is not first in our hearts. I have been deceived by all three of these avenues.

when I was listening to the wrong voices, I was being controlled by the wrong spirits. In today’s climate, it is unfortunate that anyone can say they are a prophet and live off of your donations. These are the type of people to avoid especially. These people are all false across the board if they are broadcasting themselves to an audience, giving ear tickling words, and/or collecting subscription payments off the backs of their listeners all the while, claiming that God speaks through them! Remember, God has no favorite Or more anointed children, he puts his same Holy Spirit in all of his children.

Certainly, if we are deceived, we don’t know it. I didn’t. But, if we truly want Jesus more than our own lives and more than what he could give us, he will deliver us from the deceptions that we live in. He is faithful like that, we need to be careful of our pride. We need to put his preserved and written WORD above all prophetic voices because that is how we judge those pesky prophetic voices.

Some scriptures for meditation:

2 Timothy‬ ‭3‬:‭16‬-‭17‬

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.”

Ezekiel 22:28

“Her prophets have smeared whitewash for them, seeing false visions and divining lies for them, saying, ‘Thus says the Lord God,’ when the Lord has not spoken.”

‭‭1 Timothy‬ ‭2‬:‭11‬-‭14‬

“Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.”

Acts 20:28-30

“Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood. I know that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; and from among your own selves men will arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after them.”

Jude‬ ‭1‬:‭16‬ ‭

”These are grumblers, malcontents, following their own sinful desires; they are loud-mouthed boasters, showing favoritism to gain advantage.”

Deuteronomy 13:1-3

“If a prophet or a dreamer of dreams arises among you and gives you a sign or a wonder, and the sign or the wonder comes true, concerning which he spoke to you, saying, ‘Let us go after other gods (whom you have not known) and let us serve them,’ you shall not listen to the words of that prophet or that dreamer of dreams; for the Lord your God is testing you to find out if you love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul.

This Is the Way - Walk In It

I have discovered that there is no greater help in this life than a personal relationship with Jesus.
He is the savior of the universe, his father is the creator God....

Yet he STILL bends down and has unlimited time to counsel me.  He has proven to be tenderhearted toward me, even when I fail him.  God will always counsel through Spirit and Truth...  Truth being his word, and Spirit is: don't dare put him in a box because he is going to lead you the way he sees fit to deal with you!

I have discovered that God decided to speak to me plainly. The voice is not audible but I hear it in my spirit. In 1st Kings 19:12 the bible describes it as the still small voice.  When I hear it I am still amazed even though I have probably heard it more than two dozen times across an array of situations in my adult life.

I have never spoken in tongues, nor have I healed the sick because of my prayers.  I cannot play an instrument and lead people in worship even though I have longed to do that.  I questioned the Lord one day as to why he decided to speak to me in this mannor.  This question he decided to reply to, "I couldn't have gotten you any other way."

That took me into some very deep reflection.  I remember hearing his voice distinctly when I was twenty years old which was a very destructive time in my life.  What people saw of me was a girl who needed attention. A girl on drugs that loved instant gratification and the attention of men.  What people didn't see was the meditations of my heart that were hidden to all except God.

The things that would pierce and stab my heart the most during those dark years were abused children and the desire to be intimately loved and intimately known.  That's when this "Jesus" started pursuing me.  "I love you", "Your important to me", "Repent", "Those earings don't make you beautiful, it's your heart." His words were always strategically placed, when I needed them the most.

I started a journal of all my encounters with God.  At 21 I was involved in a roll over car accident. A week before the accident the Lord assured me that he was protecting me and that I would not die.  The day he said that to me I had just come out of a church where I was compelled to stand up before a congregation I did not know.  Through tears I was asking God to help me stop living a life of wickedness.

For the past 13 years his voice has directed me through many trials.  I have been delivered of many sins. Out of all the things his voice has shown me the greatest thing is that I can do NOTHING apart from him.






 

Sowing & Reaping

I wanted to write a blog about something the Lord had been showing me.  I could not think of a way to start it so I began with writing the second and third paragraphs instead.  I then decided to save the draft and run to the corner store for a soda.  When I left the store a young man was walking in.  He was dirty with huge gages in his ears. As I walked outside I noticed a young girl on foot who was obviously paired up with that young man.  They both had the big gages and looked equally disheveled. She was talking to another young woman who was sitting in a parked car.  The woman in the parked car was waiting for the driver of the car who was in the store buying cigarrettes and a case of beer behind me in line.  I noticed that the young woman in the car was shaming the girl who was pared up with the dirty young man; "Those gages in your ear will mess up your ears." And, "are you on birth control? You don't want to get pregnant with that guy."

I wondered if this girl had walked up to the young woman in the car and asked for money.  I could almost feel the girls shame as she left the car and walked across the parking lot.  It was clear to me that this woman in the car did not understand that shaming someone does not bring change.  We see so many times in the Bible that Jesus loved the sinner whom he was talking to and jumped into the person's pain with them and took the time to explain to them the better way to live.  The only times in scripture we see Jesus being consistently harsh was when he addressed the self-righteous religious people.

I believe that God wants his people to understand a spiritual law that if broken will keep his people enrobed in frustration and will hinder an abundant life. But in order for people to receive His teachings they first must understand that Jesus is not like that woman mentioned above who sat in the car shaming the outward appearance or even the sins we have hidden inside.  God brings conviction and restoration, not shame and condemnation.

The spiritual law is that of reaping and sowing. Scripture gives us so many pictures of our lives being parallel with how things grow in nature.  When we sow seeds like a farmer does, we will reap whatever seed we planted. Sow carrot seeds, reap carrots. Sow peach pits, reap a peach tree.  So it is with our lives. When we sow obedience to the scripture we know, we will then reap a harvest of blessings.  When we sow disobedience to his word, we will reap destruction.

When a farmer sows his seed he does not reap immediate results.  He must first cultivate his seeds with the proper nutrients, especially the nutrient of time.  Time requires patience on the part of the farmer.  So it is in our lives. When we start obeying the spiritual laws written out for us in the Bible we need to cultivate these seeds with faith and patience. Two days of abstaining from obsessive shopping, alcohol abuse, or a sexual addiction does not turn a planted seed into a full grown tree.  It takes time and continued faithfulness to break these addictions off our lives.

The fruit from a tree is the crowning purpose and finished product of a plant. The fruit once started as a seed that was sown. Continued trust in a good heavenly father who knows what is best for us is the only way we will see this crowning fruit in our lives. The fruit is what others can get from us to nourish and heal themselves with.  God's desire is always to produce this choice fruit in our lives.  He will even prune his peoples branches in order to produce more fruit! Pruning is usually the equivalent of having us go through trials to make us stronger and more enduring of hardship.

Let the seeds sprout, let them have their time in the ground to germinate, let them be young plants in the sun. Do not throw away the progress in your life and give up because the harvest is not yet visible.  Harvests take time and are nourished one day at a time.

"So let us not get tired of doing what is good. For at the proper time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we do not give up."  Galatians 6:9

"Do not be deceived: God will not be mocked. A man will reap whatever he has sown." Galatians 6:7

"My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge." Hosea 4:6

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways." Isaiah 55:8

"Just Listen"

Yesterday I had the best day. I feared nothing and was walking in victorious faith, and then there was today. It was awful. I forced myself out of bed and after a Starbucks run I made it into work.  I gave my forced smiles and hello's to coworkers and started my day.  I did have that truth in the back of my mind that I am to live by faith and not my feelings. I am to believe what God says about me and where he is taking me in life and not get side tracked by my circumstances, discouraging voices of others, and my own tendency to believe lies. Knowing this got me to work this morning.

I know in the past when I forced myself to do what I am supposed to do out of obedience, that God would bless me. Today was one of those days.  A student came up to me pretty early on in the day and asked to speak with me. Normally when she needs to talk to me her countenance is discouraged and she needs some encouragement.  She is a believer and when I speak of Jesus and spiritual things she leaves our conversation encouraged. But today was different. Our roles were reversed. I was discouraged and her face was shining.  Her joy was contagious.

She told me that she had recently heard the "still small voice" of God. She said she had been upset about how her situation with her peers had been going and how the girls had been struggling with one another. She cried out to God as to what to do.

She then heard his voice, "Just Listen".  She knew he was telling her to sit and listen to them. When she obeyed his voice she was then given even greater wisdom.  He showed her different reasons why one of girls acted the way she did. It gave her more compassion for her peers as she just listened.

By this point in this young woman's conversation with me I was completely filled with faith again, ready to walk in victory and strength, without fear.  I was happy that she is now experiencing that intimacy with the Lord that he desires with all of us...but to get it we need to let go of ourselves and in humility seek him with a whole heart.  There is no doubt in my mind that if any person pursues God in this way he will take them on an adventure that will result in the salvation of peoples souls.

This morning my student became my teacher and it was affirmed that I am in the right place. I know seasons change but for now I am where I am and I'm learning to die to my perceived rights and my comfort in order to bless others.  This is so much more rewarding and exciting and more difficult (for real) than the life that I used to live.  I can only hope to mirror my teacher Jesus Christ in greater intensity as I am taken through these tests of faith.

What is my greatest flaw Lord?

My soul thirsts for you; 

my whole body longs for you. 

Psalm 63:1 

I was just telling my husband at dinner that I feel what is described in the above Psalm. I just don't have an agenda anymore. I don't want anything but Him. I want to have more kids. I want a comfortable life. I don't want trials, but none of that really matters. What matters to me at this moment is my longing to be one with Christ. To be at home with him, to learn all about him, to experience his power and great wisdom.

Yet I am in a big trial. I'm smack dab in the midst of a whopping trial.  The Bible says trials would come so I am not responding like something strange is happening to me; instead I sat on the back patio in the cool night air and stared at the stars.

And there it happened. I allowed my soul to long for him. I stared out at the majesty of his stars and allowed the tears to fall. I accepted that I am in a trial and my good father knows about it. For once in my life I embraced the trial, knowing it was in the will of God for me to suffer. But I did question! My father who formed me knows I'm too tenacious for anything less.

How long God? How long will this trial last? Then I wondered why I am am required to walk in faith and not by sight. I know that God will not waste a moment of my life. And finally, the resolution to my questioning... 

I asked him: "What is my greatest flaw Lord? What do I need to work on?"  I thought he was going to tell me to go and apologize to my husband (ahh marital bliss!) 

But I heard only one word within me, "Endurance."

Oh his majesty. His one word satisfied me. His one word proved that this trial is not in vain and he is guiding me and shaping me through it.  I've also been realizing that if his people will stay in a trial until it is finished, without bitterness, he will do things for his kingdom that will be far reaching. 

Ok Lord. My soul longs to return to you, but if that is what you require of me I will study and practice endurance -in your strength.

Thank you

endurance 

1. The measure of a person's stamina or persistence.

   He has great endurance, he ran a marathon and then rode his bicycle home.

2. Ability to endure hardship.

Let Them Fail

My son is now twelve and I have been shown an excellent parenting tip.

  My new husband has actually helped me discover this treasure.  I started to discover it on my own but didn't completely live it. Not sure why, maybe it's because giving people what they want takes no effort on my part, but resisting them does.

 I think we have raised a generation of children who have been given what they wanted and not told no very often.

Simply, here it is. Tell them NO and let them fail.  Both of these things are vital.  When we don't set boundaries that cannot be passed and tell them no they see people as objects. When they grow up parents, siblings, friends, and spouses are seen as what they can do for them, not what can be done for the other person.

When a child is rescued from every failure they never experience disappointment. Disappointment can lead us to a relationship with God. Rescuing incapacitates them from doing things on their own.

I will never forget when my son learned to ride a bike.  I tried to teach him a year prior but he had no interest. He finally wanted to play with the other boys in the neighborhood who all had bikes so he had to learn.  We were out side and he fell many times. I tried to rush in and help but he kept pushing me away. I felt so sad to see him cry.  At one point he was about to give up and there was my que. I encouraged him with my words and he got back up again. After several more tries and frustrations he was off and riding on his own.

I have learned the very best thing I can do as a mom is be there for advice and encouragement but I cannot put him in a bubble, I cannot rescue him from trial, and I cannot allow him to do whatever he wants.  I am the parent and he is the child.  I grow the most in my life through pain and trial and I see the same pattern in my son.  As he is suffering we talk through it. I remind him that it's okay to suffer and it's part of life. I remind him that God sees him and is forming his character through the trials. I remind him that to be a Christ follower he will suffer for the kingdom of God. Part of Love actually means to "long suffer" for the good of another person.

Once I repented (changed my mind) about trials, I was a better parent because I allowed my child to experience them too.  He will not isolate on video games, he will not have everything he asks for, he will not stay home from school because of this or that, he will not control me because I have been given the duty of showing him what it will mean to be a man with responsibilities. A man that works, forgives, loves, and is faithful.

I'm 35 Today

Today I am 35 years old.  I guess this is a pretty significant birthday.  My husband told me that 35 was not a big deal, but 36 was because you were on that other half of 30 that was nearing 40. Not sure about his logic. I’m fighting off the idea that he was down playing it so he wouldn’t have to make a big deal out of it.  He’s not very festive.  I guess in one year I will make sure he knows to celebrate it, after all, 36 is closer to the big 40.  I really want to call him a Jehovah’s Witness right now.

My birthday has always been important to me.  My mom used to make them special for me.  I remember being a little girl and my mom would buy me presents and celebrate.  She also would take me to the store to buy gifts for my friend’s birthday parties.  She gave me special moments in life. 

My most significant birthday was my 21^st.  I don’t remember going out and partying.  To the contrary, I partied, but that part of my life brought me great pain and emptiness.  I remember the eve of my 21^st birthday. I lived alone in an apartment in southern California.  I slept on the couch that night because I was so depressed. Being heavily dependent on marijuana at that time didn’t help the depressive state I was in either.  On the morning of my birthday I woke up on the couch with the light from the sliding glass door reaching me with its warmth.  Right upon waking I heard the Holy Spirit say, “Happy birthday to you.”

It makes me cry when I even think about it.  How lost I was and how desperate I was, that God spoke gently to me.  That was just one of many times I have heard his “still small voice” drawing me out of my sin and spurring me on toward salvation.  

So today I “celebrate” 35 years, my son is a middle schooler, my husband is already over 40, I have wrinkles when I smile,  some music is too fast and too loud, rollercoasters make me dizzy… basically, I am nearing middle age and if I die at 70 I am officially middle age.  And I would like to declare, I am so okay with this fact.  God has been so patient and kind with me. I long to be at home with Jesus! I no longer get presents, cakes, and parties and the cycle of life is rolling along but eternity is becoming more real to me every day.  It’s almost too good to be true. 

For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. – Matthew 16:25